Tuesday, January 15, 2013

I'm Back 2013!


Happy New Year! Some of you may have noticed we've added one to our crew. It's been quite a change in our lives (as you can imagine). I've taken a step back from the blogging and social media for the past 4 months to adjust.

Well yesterday Micah and I made a roadtrip up to Cache Valley and we got an official signature from the judge declaring us legal guardians. It was such a great relief knowing that we had a stamp of approval from the State of Utah. 

The more delicate situation is that of Kairie's mom, my sister. I won't go into all the details but you can imagine the heart break that has gone on in both of our homes over Kairie's situation. The end result was that Kairie was brought down to our home in Salt Lake City and we've had her since mid-September. 

We've had a bumpy road and most of all was the question of "Can I love this little 3 year old and accept her in every way that I do my own daughter?!" I was a bawling wreck for 2 days over this question. I can only say that Micah has been my rock throughout this whole thing. He never once questioned that matter, he could only tell me that he knew the right path and that's the one that our Savior has given us. 

Kairie is adjusting well, she of course knows that I'm not her mommy. She calls Micah "daddy" as she never had a daddy figure around, and it's what Isla calls him. She either calls me Tawni or "Mommy Tawni" at times. Depends on the day. I don't mind either one, and Micah and I both agree that although we are the parent figures in her life we aren't trying to replace anyone. Kairie will always have the opportunity to talk and see Ashley. We of course have our boundary lines and Ashley has respected those boundaries very well. We've been very generous with driving up to Logan so Ashley and Kairie can see one another, but now it's come to the point where it's now Ashley's responsibility to make transportation down here to Salt Lake City to see Kairie because we can't afford to make trips up there regularly. 

Guardianship means that we are in charge of Kairie's personal needs including, shelter, education, and medical care. We also keep track of the child support that is provided for Kairie, the obvious thing is that we spend her child support money on her and her only. Apparently there's a lot of scam going on with guardians - which is just despicable because the money is for the child! It just makes me livid about those people that pocked that money for themselves and not the children...Sorry went off on a tangent there...

One of the biggest concerns was her language and speech. We had her tested at the Early Childhood Intervention Program they have down here and they assessed her at a 2.5 year old level of speech/language. They have a preschool for those that qualify, but Kairie was testing right on the borderline every test. So they made a judgement call and told us to put her in a regular preschool and see if she can improve by Spring. If not then she could go into the preschool that provides speech therapy and special education teachers. 

So we enrolled her at The Winner School and she's loved it. She is also signed up for dance and can't wait to show Isla her new dance moves when she gets homes. Kairie comes home and tells us of her friends: Roman and Lola all the time. Isla is super bummed every time we go to school, only because she can't go yet. 

Kairie has not gotten into a schedule, and she's fully potty-trained now :) That makes me a happy "mommy Tawni" I can only handle one in diapers at a time. Which on a side-note Isla has been doing pretty well with JUST PANTIES for 5 days now!! There's of course an accident every once in a while, but can I just say how great it is to be without a huge bulking diaper bag?! The freedom!!

Isla has adjusted well. Since I was babysitting Boston and Phoenix for awhile, Isla got used to having other kids in her space. So Kairie's appearance into her life was just another playmate. Isla has never shown any jealousy over Micah and I, and her and Kairie get along quite well. There's of course the argument over toys or princess movies, but that's to be expected with children close in age. Micah still can't get over the amount of Barbie's, Princesses, PINK AND PURPLE everywhere he looks. 

Now where do we go from here? We just take one day at a time and we consider Kairie as a part of our family. It's still so new for all involved and we are so grateful for all of our families and friends that are around us that have accepted Kairie as well. I don't think Kairie knows how truly blessed she is to have such an army of love around her. The bottom line is that everyone just wants what is best for Kairie and if her emotional and physical needs are being met then everyone comes out a winner. 


2 comments:

Megan said...

Congratulations on your new addition! :)

The Ostebos said...

Tawn! It's been ages! I just found your blog, I love it. I'd wish I'd seen it earlier. It's such a good way to know what the heck is going on in your life! It's been too long. Wow you are so brave and amazing to take on your new addition. Such faith you have, and you make the cutest family! I hope all is well, sounds like there have been some adjustments. Can't wait to see what else you guys are up to:).
Love, Whit